Lost Regarding Lost -TOMP

You've always heard about those horrific accidents that people see on the streets and just can't avert there eyes because they're so locked into the turmoil and fire ball to follow.  Well, I present to you the 2009 Detroit Pistons!  Its gotten to the point where I'm not even angry at them anymore, just disappointed.  The cliche feels plenty appropriate here.  Now, it doesn't even look like they're going to make the playoffs, and to make matters worse they have to face the Magic & Celtics in back to back games this weekend.  Um, 10 game losing streak here we come.  I haven't seen anything this pathetic since Lost last night.

In case you're not a Lost-a-holic and haven't tuned into fine website gems such as the Lostpedia. Let me give you a quick recap of the past few weeks.  Note, you will need the following details for a background story (minor spoiler alert): Six people managed to get off the island (it took 4 seasons, but it happened). One character, John Locke, must make the six return, or everybody left on the island dies (I'm bored again just thinking about it). Anyway, John gets off the island to get the other six to come back, however that works.

Any of the 6 who got off the island: John, what are you doing here?

John: I've come to bring you back to the island.

The 6: Fuck that.

John: Damn.

Random Creepy Guy Everybody Listens To: Bring them back John. You're special.

I just saved you four hours of your life, and a half season of time travel and bullshit I've had to sit through.

Every week we're told, the next episode will "Answer your questions," be "What you've been waiting for" and a "Can't miss."  Thanks Lost. I'd really like some clarification on a few of the following, if you're really serious about this.  Um, how about, what's that smoke cloud that kills people?  That seems like a good question to answer, and gee its only been what, FIVE YEARS that you've been hiding this one.

I'm not even going to get into Hurley still weighing 400 lbs after being on an island for four months. Whatever.  Although, the fact that his dad is Cheech does explain why he's so hungry all of the time.

Man, what else? Oh! I know, how about what the hell is that four toed statue foot about that we saw one time for about six seconds?  Did a camel that wears flip flops found the island?

Come on dude, Sawyer misses Kate. Its been three years (Lost time, about 2 weeks Real Time) since she left, is that spark still there? God, I need to know! NOW!  Have these two even banged yet?  If so, I can't remember because its been three years (Real Time).  So, would you rather know how they managed to move an entire island through time or if Sawyer gets to mack on Kate's cupcake.  Unless there's a YouPorn spin-off here, I'm going with the prior as opposed to the later. You decide.

For a show with a pre-determined end date, I'm tired of being thrown around like a Taiwanese whore on Chinese New Year.  Enough is enough already.  It wouldn't be so bad if they dished a little batch of answers every now and then, but instead they choose to either:

A.) Throw some more people on the island

B.) Add some mysterious new aspect to the island like, oh, fucking time travel

C.) Sprinkle some crack on you while you're passed out with pants down and walk away

While I'm sure this formula has worked remarkably well for Lost addicts such as myself, I hope they realize that over a third of viewers have stopped watching because its just so damn confusing.  Unfortunately, I'm in "sticking it out for the long run" group, because there is only a season and a half left, and I just need closure.  Frankly, I'm surprised they haven't gotten Nic Cage to sign on to the show yet, since it seems like its right up his alley.

"You're fucking out. I'm fucking in."

Boston Rock Radio Song of the Week: Kings of Leon - "Use Somebody"