A Bracket Buster Preview -TOMP

As the entire nation should be well aware, the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament kicks off tomorrow afternoon at 12:20 when the mighty Bayou Bengals face off against the Bulldogs of Butler.  The tourney marks some of the most unpredictable outcomes that you could ever imagine, and it should not come as a surprise that I look to dominate the various betting pools around the nation like it's nobodies business. 

I've learned a thing or two over the past few years, mostly that i just kick ass at picking winning tourney teams.  In the past three years I'm well over 86% (actual data misplaced) correct in my picks and 100% correct when it comes to which team SHOULD have won the game.  For instance, when Western Kentucky beat Drake last year with this buzzer beater, yours truly had the Bulldogs marked for victory.  Why didn't that work out?  Cheating referees.

So, I'd like to present to you my top five "keep it on the dl" tourney upset victories of the week.  Please note; these are locks.

My first move is pretty obvious. Guess who's back in the big dance?  You got it, the WKU Hilltoppers.  Why do I like the Hilltoppers? Well, for starters the refs really favor them,  as we can recall from the Drake game.  This also happens to be a pretty explosive team, early in the season, they managed to top the #1 seed in the tourney, Louisville.  They shoot 36% from behind the three point line and have nearly five guys that average double digits in a game, led by the one and only, A.J. Slaughter. I know, his name is incredibly bad ass. The real selling point on this is their opponent, the Illinois Illini, a member of the Big 10(11) conference.  All you really need to know about the Big 10(11) is that they're big, slow and don't put up any points.  Oh, and Illinois lost to Penn State 38-33.  Try not to doze off during this one.

The Michigan Wolverines are playing the Clemson Tigers. One of these teams will fall apart faster than Dubaku's invasion of the White House (Thanks, Jack).  Hint: it's not the Wolverines.

Your next play here is to go with the incredibly risky ploy of taking a 14 seed to blow up a 3. If you want to win, you take North Dakota State University to bury the Kansas Jayhawks.  Hear me out before you go ballistic. Lets back a few years. The year was 2005, and Kansas was a three seed who happened to be a part of one of the biggest upsets in tourney history when they were upended by Bucknell 64-63 on March 18. Look it up. I was there (in spirit).  The Bucknell mascot, you ask? The Bison. And who are NDSU? Oh, that's right, the Bison. You following me?  KU is going to staring down five white guys with buzz cuts and see a bunch of n00bs with ball skills like Jerome James.  Four senior starters and they shoot 41% from behind the arc. Did I mention that Gus Johnson will be doing the play by play? You're welcome.

Here's a tip I learned living in Boston. Don't bet on a team that beats UNC one day and loses to Harvard the next. BC is going to take a pounding from the Trojans. Bet your illegitimate daughter's college tuition on it, so she can fit right in with the maroon & gold Eagle crowd.

Now, here's the ultimate sleeper.  You've probably forgotten about this team because they dipped off at the end of the season and didn't make as big of a splash as they have in the last few years.  They've got superb coaching, play awesome defense, have an incredibly underrated senior point guard and have been to the last three Final Fours.  Of course, I'm talking about the one and the only UCLA Bruins.  They're a six seed facing a tough VCU team in the first round match-up, but these guys play some mega good hoops with the likes of Josh Shipp & Darren Collison controlling the tempo of the game.  What are the two factors that determine how far a team can go? Great guard play and lock down defense baby. The Bruins feature both. They finished second in the Pac-10, so its not like they completely shat the bed.  When they get past VCU, they're going to kick the crap out of 'Nova.  Yeah, I'm a Big East guy. Yeah, the game's in Philly.  Yeah, 'Nova should win.  But I just took a call from Ben Howland.  Informed him that I picked his team.  He started crying out tears of joy instantly. Don't make me say I told you so.

Enjoy it when you win thousands in your pool, divorce your wife and get with that 18 year old when you pull up to her high school in a Porsche.

Enjoy the weekend, and I'll see you for the Sweet Sixteen.

"You're Fucking Out. I'm Fucking In."

Boston Rock Radio Song of the Week: "Comedown" -Bush